The G.I.R.L.S of 2008

Yes, yes, y'all:

What a long, crazy, wildly seesawing year. Even on a planet as nutty as ours, 2008 was EXTRA. It was the best of times and it was the worst of times for many, including your favorite DJ's Favorite DJ. Time to get it crackkin' for the New Year, so: Let's put our heads together and assist each other in the never-ending battle, OK? As always, to ground us, I've assembled the high points of 2008, for your delectation. OK? Ok, then. . .Onward:

---

---

Air: (415) 533-9270 • Earth: 57 Cayuga Ave, SF, CA 94112
Water: get@KevvyKev.com • Fire: KZSU Stanford, 90.1 FM, Sundays 6-9PM

---

---

Okay, let's say it up top: we have a black president. WHAT???!!!?!!! That, more than anything else, defines 2008. Just when you thought life couldn't get nuttier than the Giants beating the Pats in the Superbowl, Americans actually elected a black man named Barack Obama to the highest office on the planet. (YES, I said it.) And to all those who claim they saw either of these mind-numbing wins coming, you're full of guano. Stop playing. The world is a better place for both victories, but NONE of us saw them coming. Nuff said; let's get to work.

---

---

• DJ RasCue's Annual Taffy Pull
• The Oakland Faders Sing Country/Western Classics
• Super Diva Caitladee Calms the F*#k Down
• Bobbito the Barber's Brushing and Flossing Clinic
• Mike B's Responsible Birth Control Seminar

---

---

"Nickolodeon is the Gateway drug for MTV." -J Live

"You've got a bright future, very bright. Everybody'll be waiting for you to slip, know what I mean? So watch yourself."
- President George W. Bush, to Barack Obama on their first meeting in 2005

"When Obama gave his victory speech, he had all that Plexiglass around him. It looked like he was standing in a check-cashing place. 'I'm going to heal this nation and restore it to greatness. But in the meantime, can I get two Lotto tickets and a pack of Newports?'"
- DL Hughley

"I find it funny that we voted for the rights of chickens and not gays."
- Anonymous Californian Craigslist poster

"You guys nominated Sarah Palin for vice president ahahahaha"
- tylsamies (YouTube message board poster)

"Experience at what? Hunting? Populating the planet with children with bad names, Palin wins there. Are you kidding me? Is she on the senate foreign affairs committee NO Has she served in senate and worked in DC NO. Does she have any economic background? = NO Obama was the president of the Harvard Law review. SHE WENT TO 4 schools for undergrad. I'm so f$#king sick of Palin being compared to Obama. It's like comparing a 1978 Pinto hatchback to a 2009 Maybach Sedan. She is a liability. You guys lose."
- moceanworker (YouTube message board poster)

"Seeing you take your rightful place, based solely on your wisdom, stamina and character, is a balm for the weary warriors of hope."
- Alice Walker to Obama.

---

---

This year's top honor goes to that mind-boggling "Ante Up" Sesame Street Remix. I say this w/the greatest respect and affection for Scarlet who took a tumble, and the Boyz in the Hood who flipped out when they couldn't get a Whopper. The term "genius" is overused, but Definitely applies here:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=21OH0wlkfbc

---

---

• Big up at the top to RZA, for puttin' me on. Stats also to the entire fam, including but not limited to Kinetic, the Reverend Burke, Tamika, Eva, Will Strickland, Rugged Monk, Stone Mecca, Creed, and Solomon Childs.
• Ranks to Camp Lo, who also took your boy on the road and made it Crack. Still doin' it and givin' lessons on lookin' good while they do.
• Love and respect to Eternia, Tona, Mindbender, and the entire Toronto collective. Keep it pushin'. . .
• Congrats to Papa D for passing the Massachusetts Bar Exam. That's real, Real big, familia.
• Stats to Z-Trip, for the special free Obama mixtapes *alone*. . .uda Don.
• Big up to EJ and the entire staff at Nikki Beach; for putting on some of the HOTTEST events of 2008.
• To Tracey Murrell: Somehow through all the years, you are still That Girl!
• Congrats to DJ Eclipse & the crew, for the 15-year anniversary. Aooogah!
• Big up to Pickster and the entire AZ massive, who hold it DOWN in their market. Let's make things happen!

---

---

• Russell Gatewood (Still thinks Obama is a city "somewhere in the dirty South")
• True Justice & LCJ, who showed up to the Valentine's Day party as Batman & Robin. Huh?
• Lee L'Heureux, who, let's face it; just made that name up.
• Finalist, Unclear on the Concept, Special Olympics division: your boy Brian Sampson, who went to 24 hour Nautilus tryin' to find a curlin' iron. Which speaks to confusion of several levels, since Brian has been tryin' to grow a mohawk for about a decade, now. Sigh.

---

---

So we're at the Doubletree hotel in Dallas; not the best but by No Means the worst hotel you can stay at. So imagine RZA's surprise when he sees a roach as big as two thumbs in his room. Yes, that big. Plus homie was pimp-walkin' across the carpet, actin' like he belonged there, so Tamika does the logical: she calls security on 'im.

No, for real.

So security shows up, thinkin' a hysterical chick is gonna be there, and when RZA opens the door, the guy is like, "whoa." Not only is it not an overreactin' chick, it's a Big Dude, who happens to be the RZA. Anyway: homeboy recovers, comes in and looks around; of course by now Mr. Roach has decamped. . .so the security guy thinks RZA was bullsh#!ttin' or something. Before things get to a fever pitch, he glances over and sees the chessboard set up on the side table. "Oh you play chess? I been playin' for 16 years!" RZA bein' RZA replies, "So let's go." Halfway through the chessboxin', the roach came out from under the bed, like "What, what." The security cat was like "Oh, ok. . .thought y'all were bulls#!tt!n, but there really was a situation up in here." The roach was still tryin' to get brolic, talkin' about "I got next," but caught a quick two sprays instead, and that was that.

PS: of *course* RZA won the game. You know how we get down.

---

---

James ordered a pool cue, priced at $3.56. Unfortunately, James is an Eskimo who lives in a very remote part of Greenland and the rules there forbid any package longer than 4 feet to be imported. The cue was 4 feet and 1 inch, just a little too long, so how can it be mailed to James without breaking the rules? Ideally James would like the cue to arrive in one piece. First correct answer wins an authentic set of Dave Paul neck bolts. GO!

---

---

President Bush and Vice President Cheney were having lunch at a cafe. After looking at the menu, President Bush turned to the waitress and said that he'd like a quickie. The waitress turned red, slapped his face, and stomped off.

Vice President Cheney sighs, "Mr. President, I believe that's pronounced 'quiche'."

---

---

The top 10 SABs of the year, in no particular order:
SuperDJ Jerry Ross and Lamaar Odom. The pictures speak:


So House was on, and then a commercial came on, and I realized Hugh Laurie has been moonlighting as that White Gold lunatic. Which made me shoot (what else? Milk. . .) outta my nose. Yes, I'm watching a little too much TV these days:


Sarah Cassidy & Jennifer Beals. You don't know who Sarah is (yet), and some of you whippersnappers may not even know JB. But Wow:


Followed up lovely by Tom Selleck and the Red Baron Pizza Pilot. HA:


Matt Murphy & Kid Miracleman. If you're not a comic book nerd & Rec League Fan, you don't get it. But if you are, trust me: Hahahahahahahahaha WOW. I know at the very least, Grip Grand gets it:


DJ Wiz & Adisa Banjoko. Do I really need to amplify? Come on:


Janice the muppet fashionista & Donatella Versace. Stop playin':


Your host w/the most, & newest member of the crew: the inimitable F.L.O., who. . .wait for it. . .IS a fake-a$$ Don "D.C." Curry. Wwwwwwwwwwow:


Which brings us to the erstwhile ESPN maven Dan Patrick, who apparently has been moonlighting as the Kingsford charcoal guy. Ahahahahahahaha:


Which leads us neatly into another cat that tried to shift gears, slightly alter the look, & hide: Tuffy, who clearly started his career as Prince Be from PM Dawn. You're not slick:

---

---

It's the Source; it's the Hip-Hop, it's what it's all about, it's The Greatest Show On Earth. . .It's The Drum, Son. Every Sunday from 6-9PM at KZSU Stanford, 90.1 FM, available via live broadcast, online at http://kzsulive.stanford.edu, or podcast for posterity at underheard.org. Tell Everybody. This best of 2008 collated list contains singles as well as albums (bold text). In a year of heaters, this list represents the best and brightest & proves conclusively that, despite what Anyone tells you: Hip-Hop is alive and well.

So.

Here We Go,
Kev

"I'm on that new improved s#!t like Tolkein was tokin'
I'm more than grimy, I'm oy gevolt revoltin'
Invokin' mine is more than insultin', it's verboten molten quotin'
Now ya sulkin cause y floatin in spoken ferocious lava oceans
I don't tap that @$$ when strokin', I swat it; I'm the Sultan
I got ya pigeons moltin' from pokin' the yolk in
I'm not gloatin' but it's worth notin' that after the votin'
Eric B was never president, cause yours truly got wrote in"
2008

---

Artist - - - Track
Black Milk - - -> The Matrix f/Pharoahe Monch, Sean Price, & DJ Premier
Brooklyn Academy - - -> Bored Of Education
Camp Lo - - -> Lumdi
Das EFX - - -> Can U Feel It
DJ Babu Duck Season Vol. 3
DJ Revolution King of the Decks
Duwende - - -> Poor Dan
East Coast Avengers - - -> Prison Planet
Grip Grand - - -> I Chose Rap
Hasan Salaam 15 Minutes
Heltah Skeltah - - -> D.I.R.T.
Ill Bill ft. Raekwon - - -> Coka Moshiach
J Period Q Tip for President
Jake 1 White Van Music
Jedi Mind Tricks Feat. Block McCloud & King Magnetic - Godflesh
J-Live - - -> Then What Happened?
King Magnetic Everything's a Gamble
LL Cool J - - -> Ring Tone f. Grandmaster Caz
Method Man & Redman - - -> Broken Language 2
Naughty By Nature - - -> Hip Hop Honors
Notorious B.I.G. F. Nas Halloween
Phillip Drummond & Lush One - - -> Music For Dope Runs
Rahman Jamal - - -> This Isn't Art
Rakim - - -> Love 4 Sale
Rass Kass - - -> B.I.B.L.E.
Richie Cunning Night Train
RZA - - -> Digisnax
Shaun Boothe - - -> Unauthorized Biography of James Brown
The Heliocentrics f. MF Doom & Percee P - - -> Distant Star
Wu-Tang Clan - - -> Watch Your Mouth